this is mostly about my brother.
16.06.12 | 12:24 am

this post is coming to you in four (rather long) parts!

PART ONE: my worst flaw

if you ever believed that i was lying or exaggerating in the slightest about how when i like something, i really, really like it, and i become a little bit obsessive about it... well... remember the other night when i said i finished 2007 part one of the vlogbrothers? i'm now finished with 2007 part two AND 2008. color yourself surprised, amirite?

PART TWO: my brother

here is some background for you that is sort of necessary for this story (and forgive me because this story is long):

i have five brothers, and i am the only girl. in descending order of age, they are: john ryan (aka rj aka kj jr.) (27), ryan seth (26), casey (24), travis (20), and bret (16) (i am between casey and travis, if you were curious).

my dad was married and had a kid by the time he was eighteen, which was john ryan, and with that same wife had casey three years later.

in the meantime, my mom accidentally got pregnant with ryan seth, whose father didn't really want him and didn't want to be a part of his life.

(travis, bret, and i are the three kids of our parents together.)

ryan seth's real father died when he was two years old. now let me level with you here: this is extremely sad. it is, and i recognize that. but you've also got to realize that (as said by my mother) his father never wanted to be a father in the first place.

i would also like to preface this with the fact that ryan seth and i used to be very, very, very close.

when ryan seth was around 16 or 17, he got a concussion from playing basketball. it was a really, really bad concussion. he started taking painkillers.

before long he was addicted to said painkillers... and moved on to other things.

when ryan seth turned 18, he was given $30,000 from his father's life insurance. that is a HUGE sum of money, can we agree? do you know what i would do with that money? PAY FOR MY MOTHER FUCKING GRAD SCHOOL. do you know what he did with that money?

...blow it all on drugs and rent.

i mean, the rent, yes! smart move! but seriously... he went through that much in a year. on drugs.

that's a big deal. obviously.

ryan seth was the first grandchild for my nanny and pappy. because of this... he has always (no seriously, always) had better treatment than us. and i'm not saying we were treated poorly (we weren't) but ryan seth has always been treated exceptionally well. they took him in when he got kicked out of our house or moved out the numerous times that happened due to drugs. oh, those over twenty cars he's totaled/messed up? THEY GIVE HIM A NEW ONE CONSTANTLY. i just found out that they gave him ANOTHER truck since his last one died.

oh, let's not teach ryan seth to actually have to pay for his own mistakes, right? that'd be terrible.

guess who didn't get a new car for free from nanny and pappy when ryan seth totaled her beautiful green mustang? me. guess who didn't get a new car for free from nanny and pappy when it died all of a sudden that was literally no fault of her own? me.

ryan seth gets fucked up on drugs, wrecks a car, miraculously survives to find out that oh! you did something wrong? oh well! here's a new car!

i just want to state that i'm sick of it. i really am. and i am this close to just not wanting to talk to him again.

all he does is want, want, want, and he doesn't treat people well. he's always messed up on something and lying to everyone around him about it. it's pathetic. he's had every goddamn opportunity in the world (HELLO $30,000?!?!?!?!?!?!?!****) and still he blames everything on the world treating him badly. it's pathetic.

i'm just frustrated to see someone i used to be so close with turn into a person like that. it's just so frustrating. i don't even like seeing him anymore. i honestly don't.

okay, that's enough of that. it is.

PART THREE: the perfect day i had with my friends in louisville

i forgot to mention this! so, the other weekend i went to louisville to stay the night at the house i'll soon be living in and kayley came and stayed as well!

we walked all up and down bardstown road which i found utterly fascinating to be honest, and so we walked (of course) into this bookstore called carmichael's. i walked over to the YA section (uhm, i've been reading a lot of YA lately, and that's not a bad thing, so, yeah) and found John Green's The Fault in Our Stars. i pulled it down to show kayley and erin and






that's seriously how i reacted. with jumping. and smiles.

oh, i am ridiculous. how do i have friends?

so of course i bought it, and it is now sitting happily on my... tv stand. it will have a nicer home in louisville.

they also took me to eat at The Bard's Town (PUNS! SHAKESPEARE! FOOD! seriously it's like perfect for me! which is exactly why they took me there!)! i highly recommend it, that's all.

that night i was tricked into taking a shot of 92 proof rum. that is disgusting. never again. rum is bad. rum is really bad, guys.

but it got me talking along with the other alcoholic fails that occurred in the same night, which somehow ended in me talking about (because i'd heard everything they had to say on this kind of subject and honestly i don't talk much about these things because i'm naive and i'm the innocent one of everyone and what have you) how much i enjoy giving blowjobs, which is something i'm sure everyone is interested in, and which was rather embarrassing, but obviously not embarrassing enough because i just repeated it, didn't i?

i'm rambling and ought to go to sleep.

PART FOUR: randomness

also something you may or may not know about me: while doing nothing or you know, menial tasks, i often sing what i'm doing. not actual songs, but what i am physically doing at the time, in song form.

****is it just me, or does doing "?!?!?!?!" remind anyone else of the rosebud cheat from sims? is that even right?

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