hey now, you're an all star
19.08.12 | 7:46 pm
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i have a confession to make.
i have a problem.
while i typically love myself, and more often than not anymore i do, i'm never convinced that anyone else will love me (romantically) and this is mostly for one reason: i doubt people find me attractive. this, too, is fine--to each their own and all that.
however, it stops me in a lot of ways. because i doubt that anyone will ever find me attractive, i don't outwardly seek anyone.
this boy at work is beautiful and kind and i want to be his friend something terrible, and more than that, even.
but i'm not going to do anything about it because i don't think he'd think i'm pretty.
don't get me wrong: i think i'm awesome. i believe i'm a wonderful person (usually) because i try really hard to be that way. i may even go so far as to say there would be someone lucky to have me one day, you know (maybe). but attraction is a key point for a lot of people (i'm just odd in that for me, attraction comes from someone's personality... not their appearance). it's troubling. it is.
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i hadn't seen raiders of the lost ark or the princess bride until this weekend.
you ought to be please to know that i found them both very entertaining.
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i have the next two days off work. i am exhausted mentally and physically. i can't express how excited i am to literally have nothing to do.