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05.03.19 | 9:06 pm

i think maybe i am a good friend, but also maybe i am (i know i am) very self-involved. but at least i don't outright ignore my friends' texts about their issues they are currently having. i try really hard to address them and help them. unlike some of my friends. (this is wearing on me, sigh. and it's always the same person doing the same thing.)

this dumb will guy seems fine. we made out on sunday. that was nice. we probably won't be able to see each other this weekend, unless he decides it's worth it to drive an hour to see me, which he probably won't, and even if he did, i probably couldn't get the house to myself, and it would be weird.

anyway he seems too well-adjusted which is good but annoying. deep in my core i think i want someone slightly obsessed with me. ugh. gag me. that's so disgusting to even write out.

point being he probably isn't giving me enough attention (but equally if he did give me more attention, i'd probably hate him), so i added three boys from tinder on snapchat so maybe they'll tell me i'm cute.

kill me. i'm awful.

really i'm just sleepy and so tired. i fell asleep at 7:30p on sunday. sleeping is one of my greatest joys. it is underrated.

it maybe seems like i'm actually worried or anxious about this will person but in reality i don't feel much besides the desire to make out with him again and the inkling that maybe it wouldn't suck to hang out with him again. we had brunch and went to a museum. we kissed in the exhibit on kentucky bourbon. and again in the exhibit on lewis and clark. and again in the car. and again in his apartment. and again when he walked me to my car.

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