random thoughts while at work
29.01.21 | 11:27 am

it feels good to know, nearly a year later, that nothing will happen. that nothing was ever going to happen. (granted, nothing has caused me to “realize” this. it just feels... finished, in that way.)

it’s nice that you’ll send extra messages a day later if i haven’t responded to you. but then you’ll go days without responding to me. and it’s nothing to worry about. just take things as they come. don’t let them fill your brain any more than that.

eventually i’ll stop talking about it altogether.

i am actually meeting jake, after talking for three months, on sunday. we shall see how it goes. my expectations are low.

i keep having really intense feelings of wanting to be back in france, feeling that freedom i felt until the confinement. all i do is stay home, workout a ton, read or watch netflix, work. it feels like it’s always going to be this way (though i know, or hope, it won’t).

this is the second day of this headache. i am so tired. just always so tired somehow.

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