i'm tired. one week to spring break.
26.03.21 | 7:00 pm

it just hits me really hard sometimes, the loneliness. and at the most random points of the day, too.

i am meeting this guy named jason on sunday. we are having lunch and then going for a walk in the nearby forest. (it is not as creepy as that made it sound.) i am looking forward to it, i think, as he seems legitimately sweet, and we had a video call that went really well.

but i guess i just have that underlying feeling that no matter what, i'm never going to have those intense feelings again.

and i know i'll keep thinking that until one day, it does happen again.

but in the moment, i just feel... numb.


i've exhausted myself today. did 5.4 miles to catch myself up to 60 miles so far this month. i will have two more runs before april and so i should make it to 70, which will be my new record, i suppose. (that's not a lot for some people, but i am thrilled.)

i literally had to cut emma's walk short because my legs were so tired. and i still have to do yoga tonight. but this is good.


there are so many things on my to-do list tonight, but i think i'm just going to... read.

or sleep.

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