random idk
19.01.23 | 7:53 pm

charlieissocoollike posted a new video and came out as trans, and she plays stardew valley (my favorite -- really only -- game), so i've just been watching old videos of her playing it and also watching old youtube videos from other creators i used to watch as a high schooler, a college student, during my first bout of grad school.

how interesting it is to have "grown up" with these people; and how interesting it was to see them step back, take space, leave the site... only to come back so many years later.

i just want everyone to be able to be themselves.

and it makes me so happy that my students recognize that and feel comfortable with me and asking me to use their pronouns or call them by a different name.


i wish i felt any urge to create. any real urge to create... something.

i want to do something with my hands.

i don't even know where this is coming from.


i am very, very tired tonight. my 5k workout (hills) was exhausting, probably from my tired but successful run the other day, and i have felt the urge to cry all night.

it's probably hormones or something similar.

but i've just wanted to cry all night.

i basically haven't drank since the start of the year, but i decided to have a glass of wine tonight. i took the first drink and just didn't even want it.

i've nearly finished it now, though, so, yeah.


i want to go to banff.

i wanna go to japan this summer.

asheville this spring.

i want to go to austria and germany.

i want to go back to france. the south of france. god, do i some days miss the south of france.


tonight is a night that i wish i were living with seth.

we've been kind of redoing his living room. we bought a new rug, we bought new pillows for the cough, we bought cushion covers for his poor couch (which has been peeling... forever).

i want a space that is ours.


seems like donald glover will be in the community movie so some things in the world are good.

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