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2011-03-31 | 5:49 p.m.

look, here's the thing. i know i have friends, i know that. but here, at school, sometimes i feel like somehow, i've cut myself off, and i'm not sure how or why, but i feel like i don't really have friends in the way that i should. i have friends, well, honestly i'm not good at explaining it but it really hurts sometimes and it's hurting now even though i'm about to go to someone's birthday party.

i think it all boils down to the fact that i'm so insecure about everything, and eric just stopped me to ask what i was writing and i lost my mother fucking thought. damn it.

i think it was going to boil down to the fact that i've never had a BEST FRIEND in the sense that so many people do and so i've always felt second or third best no matter what. anyway, whatever, i have reese eggs and that's good at least.

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