19.04.16 | 6:34 pm

i feel maybe depressed. or as close to it as i've ever been.

last night i googled "how to make friends" and then i closed out the window and cried.

i tried to go shopping today to cheer myself up but everything i tried on looked terrible. i don't even want to look in mirrors. i know i look bad and i would rather hide from it all.

at target i heard this woman talking about kentucky and i asked if she was from there, and i said me too, and i wanted to have a conversation but she didn't so i moved on.

i literally don't even want to get up to feed the dogs or take them outside. i only want to eat until i am sick.

matt is trying. wants to take me on a date. wants to make me happy.

i am so sad. i love him i am so sad.

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