11.10.20 | 7:35 pm

literally living vicariously through amy and jonah on superstore.

a friend messaged me today saying she and her sister (who i met for lunch a year ago when they were in this part of the country) were laughing remembering that guy i used to date -- the married one!

she was of course talking about mish. and "date" is a strong word, considering at best we just spent the weekend together.

but... i just don't think i've done a very good job these last three years. or, like, ever, i guess.

sure, i've learned a lot. but i don't think much of it was necessary in terms of the way i learned it. i could've learned those things from other situations or circumstances...


tomorrow i'm officially going to send the emails to pull out of the program this year. i know this is the right decision -- i really, honestly do -- but god does it suck.

i tried to cheer myself up by making this list of things i can accomplish during this year back home but my life isn't going to magically change just because i'm here, just because i wrote some things on paper. i don't know.

i'm so tired. this fall break feels like it's been such a waste.

<< | >>